Hi...so the fingers on my right hand are definitely tingling right now...and I've got a major league headache...but it's raining nice and hard which is wonderful. So, lately instead of writing in here I have been escaping into books...what can I say...Books are awesome! I'd love to escape into a book today as well, but I can't 'cause Saturdays are busy days...Leading Edge, Internship, and work. Not all books are complete escapes...since they often cause me to think, sometimes about issues in my life I am trying to ignore for the moment...ah, well... So, guess what, pain makes it more difficult to think, a problem I believe I am having right now. I also think I often don't want to confront what I may being thinking or worrying about...And I find plenty to worry about. It's no wonder I like to escape into books.
I love music. And Bing Crosby and Fred Astaire are awesome...I love their music and movies! Danny Kaye is also way awesome. And of course you can't forget people like Audrey Hepburn, Katherine Hepburn, Cary Grant, Jimmy Stewart, and the list goes on and on. I also like Drew Barrymore, Hugh Jackman, Meg Ryan, and others. There is so much good music in the world and love that Pandora can link me to so much of it. I love music! Now I'm not like some people who need it like 24/7, but I still really love and love how it can brighten my life and help me sleep and help me relax and calm down, etc.
So, sometimes uncertainty can cause stress. I think I am often unwilling to admit things I truly wish and long for, especially to others. I am much better than I used to be. I think a part of me feels like if I admit what I want it will just cause me to want it more and thus be even more disappointed when I lose the possibility of it happening or something like that. I know I didn't express that very well. I know I am generally working in abstracts rather than concretes. I know that is something I need to work on in my writing. What should I do to work on concretes...I think fiction is often an easier medium for concretes--less threatening you know. At times I can move beyond caring...but oh so many times I can't...not good, not good at all. Throw it all to the wind...fears restrain me...silly, stupid fears.
There are many things I'd like to learn how to do. One of those is web design...I know I should have taken the classes when I was at BYU, but I didn't. I just wasn't in the program. I needed to graduate. But I would like to learn. The Leading Edge website needs lots of work. It makes me sad to see it so pathetic. The older version was much, much better. I should also work just generally on my design skills. Make up projects for myself, something like that. Explore and learn. There is still so much I do not know.
Sometimes I am such a silly person. I live a lot in my brain. I know we all live in our own brains, but still... sometimes I feel like I don't have a ton of interhuman communication. Hmmm. Oh-well, I guess. Don't you just love it though when there are people you really connect with! I do. People who you feel like just understand you even without knowing you, or with knowing you. There are also various levels of connection. Any connection is good, but the higher levels are more like miracles...inexplicable and wonderful.
Well, it's time for me to get going with my day...Leading Edge, Internship, Work...
Showing posts with label Pandora. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Pandora. Show all posts
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Up and beyond...
So, I think it's about time to write another post. Nathan says my posts sound like me, so that's a good thing I think. I am discovering that it is kind of difficult to type on my laptop with two arm braces on...oh-well, I'll just have to do the best that I can. I'm not really sure what to write about. Any ideas? No, well, that's okay.
Sometimes I think I'm a rather silly person. You might wonder why I say this, but I'm not sure how much proof of it I'm willing to give you. I could start with some of my theories/hypotheses/ideas. I think it is reasonable to think that there is the possibility of there being more than one universe out there, far beyond our sight. That might sound unreasonable to you, but it makes sense in my mind. Emily Olson once told me that I have "uncommon" sense rather than common sense. At times I think she is right. I do realize that the very nature of the word "universe" denotes that there is only one, but that is just because men made up the word. There is so much out there we don't know. And as I've mentioned before, sometimes I can dream pretty big--the possibility of there being more than one universe being one of those.
I love the stars and galaxies...outer space in general. That is perhaps one of the reasons why I am so attracted to the genre of science fiction/fantasy (and that is my favorite genre). I have met people who have no curiosity about space, that stars, none of that! I love pictures of space. They are so wonderful and amazing and beautiful. I'd love to do paintings based on them someday. I love Gustav Holst's The Planets--amazing music!!! I especially love Jupiter Hymn--the French Horn part is absolutely beautiful. {Note: sorry if any of you reading this are editors or grammar Nazi's, while I did minor in editing...I'm more into substantive editing rather than copyediting, plus this blog is more about just writing, without allowing things--such as making grammar mistakes--to impede the flow of writing. The goal is to just write...and to not worry about perfection.}
Do you want to know something that is mildly annoying...the limited choices when it comes to the design of blog profiles. If I knew how, I'd make my own design, unfortunately I don't know how, so I deal with the choices I've got. I actually really like design. I would love to work in the art or production department of a book publisher. I think that would be pretty awesome, but who knows where I'll end up working. I mean, I enjoy working at Day's Market, but it is hard on my body and I need a "real" job, plus I really could use benefits...aka...health insurance. I really don't know what I am going to do come Fall when I can no longer be on the BYU extended health plan. No idea. Oh well. Hopefully I'll figure something out. I have a tinsy bit more time before then. No need to worry too much. (Yes, I'm a bit of a worry wort.)
I like how when I get started writing I can often write and write on and on...unless I'm completely out of it...and then who knows what you might get. I enjoyed band in high school (this might sound like a non sequitur to you, but the thing is I'm listening to music on the "Gustav Holst" station I just created on my Pandora radio accout and yeah...) I really like the sound of band music, and I've always wondered why we don't have more bands and band music...I mean there is plenty of music by orchestra's and I do know that they include the band insturments and the music is great, but it just isn't the same thing! I also really like marching band music. But back to band music, I'd love to get ahold of recordings of the music we played in high school as done by professionals and just in general, band music (sorry if I'm not explaining all of this very well).
My goal for this evening is to not fall asleep, 'cause if I do, then I won't be able to fall asleep tonight and the cycle begins once again... So, I need to decide what else I am going to do this evening. Some thought on the matter turns up ideas like designing the cross-stiching for presents for Jenn's baby, work on typing up my journals, put things in my personal history, and of course, reading. A movie always sounds delicious, too (In recent times I have found myself misapplying words that are associated with one sense or another and it just feels right, so if I use words as I did in the sentence I just wrote, well...I figure I'm not going to fight it since it feels like the right word). The "feel" of things that I pay attention to. This is not necessarily a tactile feeling, hence the quotation marks. It is more like the feeling evoked--the feel of things.
I don't like it when I start having pain in the collar bone area. It happens rather frequently though. I try to not spend too much time concerning myself with all the various aches and pains and wierdness I feel in my body, yet it still consumes a large amount of my thoughts. I used to be better at putting such things from my mind. But getting carpal tunnel caused an awakening. Things I assumed were normal or transitory ended up being something mildly serious. (One of my friends, Camilla, once told me that I'm rather whimsical...or actually I think she was refering to my artwork...but still...I'd never thought of it that way, but I find it fits or at least feels like a word that fits me.) It is interesting to watch and see how different thoughts and turns of conversation are triggered [to avoid using the passive tense I should have writtten the previous sentence as "I find it interesting to watch and see what triggers differnt thoughts and turns of conversation."] I once worked with a girl (Brittany, it was when I worked for the BYU Conference Center Custodial) who would trace back our conversations to see how we arrived at our end result. It was rather fascinating but not something I'd generally be willing to spend my time and energy on, especially since I sometimes my memory stuggles some. But at other times I can remember lots of random things and can remember some things really well. It is one of those kind of oximoron sort of things that become difficult to explain since they seem to condradict each other. Although, it often seems to me like lots of things seem to contradict each other and then I start getting confused and people tell me I'm making things harder than they really are. The end result...well, I'm not sure what the end result is, but you're probably getting tired of this post...so I guess I shall close with...Hmmm...what's a good closing statement...if it comes to me it probably won't be until some random time and then I'll forget it, so we'll just have to go with, bland/boring/usual/random/whatever--"When you wish upon a star..."
Sometimes I think I'm a rather silly person. You might wonder why I say this, but I'm not sure how much proof of it I'm willing to give you. I could start with some of my theories/hypotheses/ideas. I think it is reasonable to think that there is the possibility of there being more than one universe out there, far beyond our sight. That might sound unreasonable to you, but it makes sense in my mind. Emily Olson once told me that I have "uncommon" sense rather than common sense. At times I think she is right. I do realize that the very nature of the word "universe" denotes that there is only one, but that is just because men made up the word. There is so much out there we don't know. And as I've mentioned before, sometimes I can dream pretty big--the possibility of there being more than one universe being one of those.
I love the stars and galaxies...outer space in general. That is perhaps one of the reasons why I am so attracted to the genre of science fiction/fantasy (and that is my favorite genre). I have met people who have no curiosity about space, that stars, none of that! I love pictures of space. They are so wonderful and amazing and beautiful. I'd love to do paintings based on them someday. I love Gustav Holst's The Planets--amazing music!!! I especially love Jupiter Hymn--the French Horn part is absolutely beautiful. {Note: sorry if any of you reading this are editors or grammar Nazi's, while I did minor in editing...I'm more into substantive editing rather than copyediting, plus this blog is more about just writing, without allowing things--such as making grammar mistakes--to impede the flow of writing. The goal is to just write...and to not worry about perfection.}
Do you want to know something that is mildly annoying...the limited choices when it comes to the design of blog profiles. If I knew how, I'd make my own design, unfortunately I don't know how, so I deal with the choices I've got. I actually really like design. I would love to work in the art or production department of a book publisher. I think that would be pretty awesome, but who knows where I'll end up working. I mean, I enjoy working at Day's Market, but it is hard on my body and I need a "real" job, plus I really could use benefits...aka...health insurance. I really don't know what I am going to do come Fall when I can no longer be on the BYU extended health plan. No idea. Oh well. Hopefully I'll figure something out. I have a tinsy bit more time before then. No need to worry too much. (Yes, I'm a bit of a worry wort.)
I like how when I get started writing I can often write and write on and on...unless I'm completely out of it...and then who knows what you might get. I enjoyed band in high school (this might sound like a non sequitur to you, but the thing is I'm listening to music on the "Gustav Holst" station I just created on my Pandora radio accout and yeah...) I really like the sound of band music, and I've always wondered why we don't have more bands and band music...I mean there is plenty of music by orchestra's and I do know that they include the band insturments and the music is great, but it just isn't the same thing! I also really like marching band music. But back to band music, I'd love to get ahold of recordings of the music we played in high school as done by professionals and just in general, band music (sorry if I'm not explaining all of this very well).
My goal for this evening is to not fall asleep, 'cause if I do, then I won't be able to fall asleep tonight and the cycle begins once again... So, I need to decide what else I am going to do this evening. Some thought on the matter turns up ideas like designing the cross-stiching for presents for Jenn's baby, work on typing up my journals, put things in my personal history, and of course, reading. A movie always sounds delicious, too (In recent times I have found myself misapplying words that are associated with one sense or another and it just feels right, so if I use words as I did in the sentence I just wrote, well...I figure I'm not going to fight it since it feels like the right word). The "feel" of things that I pay attention to. This is not necessarily a tactile feeling, hence the quotation marks. It is more like the feeling evoked--the feel of things.
I don't like it when I start having pain in the collar bone area. It happens rather frequently though. I try to not spend too much time concerning myself with all the various aches and pains and wierdness I feel in my body, yet it still consumes a large amount of my thoughts. I used to be better at putting such things from my mind. But getting carpal tunnel caused an awakening. Things I assumed were normal or transitory ended up being something mildly serious. (One of my friends, Camilla, once told me that I'm rather whimsical...or actually I think she was refering to my artwork...but still...I'd never thought of it that way, but I find it fits or at least feels like a word that fits me.) It is interesting to watch and see how different thoughts and turns of conversation are triggered [to avoid using the passive tense I should have writtten the previous sentence as "I find it interesting to watch and see what triggers differnt thoughts and turns of conversation."] I once worked with a girl (Brittany, it was when I worked for the BYU Conference Center Custodial) who would trace back our conversations to see how we arrived at our end result. It was rather fascinating but not something I'd generally be willing to spend my time and energy on, especially since I sometimes my memory stuggles some. But at other times I can remember lots of random things and can remember some things really well. It is one of those kind of oximoron sort of things that become difficult to explain since they seem to condradict each other. Although, it often seems to me like lots of things seem to contradict each other and then I start getting confused and people tell me I'm making things harder than they really are. The end result...well, I'm not sure what the end result is, but you're probably getting tired of this post...so I guess I shall close with...Hmmm...what's a good closing statement...if it comes to me it probably won't be until some random time and then I'll forget it, so we'll just have to go with, bland/boring/usual/random/whatever--"When you wish upon a star..."
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