When Do You Ask For Help?

Today I read an excellent blog post by a friend. Reading it prompted me to ponder a number of things, but the one I want to discuss here is asking for help. It is a topic I frequently think about. I feel like I have always had a hard time asking for help, and I hear lots of other people saying the same thing. So, I have some questions for you:

How do you decide when to ask for help?
How often do you feel it is okay to ask for help?
How much help is it okay to ask for?
What kinds of things is it okay to ask for help with?

Often when I think about these questions, I feel like I just need to find a way to make things work on my own (which just writing that sounds like completely the wrong way to look at things, and yet it is my automatic and ingrained response). I feel like I need to learn to prioritize better. And I feel like I am in constant need of help, which prompts the second question.

I also feel like I need to find ways to make it so that I do not feel in need of help as often. For the past few months, I have struggled facing doing dishes because by the time I finish washing a load of dishes, I am in a decent amount of pain. So, I bought scrubber brush that I can use to wash a dish or two when I feel up to it. This helps the dishes not pile up as fast. That is a positive solution that helps me feel less of a need to ask for help from others. However, all it takes is one cooked meal for there to be an overwhelming (to me) amount of dishes. Thinking about that then has me thinking that I just need to learn how to not be overwhelmed. But it also has me once again reflecting on when it is okay to ask for help and how often it is okay to ask for help. There is value in being self reliant, but I guess I'm not always sure where the border is between being self reliant and when it is okay to ask for help.

The comparison game also pops up in regards to asking for help. I will tell myself that there are so many others that need help much more than me. Or I will think that everyone else faces similar things, so I just need to learn how to make do like everyone else (which is an all or nothing sort of thinking).

This past week, I even got some help from family and friends. And it was so great. But then there is still so much more that weighs on me, so much more I feel needs to be done, so much more where I wonder if perhaps it would be okay if I asked for some help.

And so, my friends, I would love your input. I realize this is a balancing act that we are all likely in the process of trying to figure out, but if you have any thoughts on the subject, I would love to hear them.